Meeting The 'Gang'

I had been into Maddison's (M) room a couple of times since that first night and finally decided that I needed to take the plunge to start getting involved in the chat side of things.

After several discussions about it, we figured there are two options on how to proceed with me in her cam life:

Option 1) I am M's boyfriend but she keeps me out of the web chat and holds her work as a kind of side project that I stay away from. Not because I cant be trusted or because I don't want to know whats happening but simply because it would be easier that the users visiting her room continue to see M as their own, which in term meant they would spoil her with tips in exchange for shows and flashes etc.

Option 2) We involve me in this life and embrace it together. I wouldn't be on the screen because I lacked confidence in my appearance and was basically a more shy/quiet kind of guy in 'real' life. I would however get involved in chat and let the guys get to know me and show I was a good person for M to have in her life.

It was a hard decision but we wanted to be open about our love while still being able to perform shows online for the benefit of others. M is an outgoing person and has learned to get a kick from performing online. When she started camming it was seen as a job and she figured she would have to fake a certain amount of the fun she would have, however, she soon discovered that it was a turn on for her to be voyeuristic. It was also a bonus that she would then get paid for it!!!

She started a broadcasting on one of her less frequent sites, I logged in and soon enough the room began filling up.

Looking back, I envy the bravery of a new user to join with the conversation of a room. The chat content seems to carry on from a previous session because the other, more frequent users, have been here before and have context on the models life and what she might of been up to.

75% of the time its someone from the 'friend' Group to start talking then everyone else joins in when possible.

This site uses a moderator system to police the room. They can silence users who are rude or demanding because the model isn't always free to click onto the screen and remove guys. Its seen as a privilege that you would have to work up to, then once the model trusts you..... she may 'Mod' you. A room will usually only have 2-3 Mods but that is entirely up to how many the model wants.

One benefit of being a Mod is that you can't be silenced in the room. It is for this reason that M made me a moderator in her room. Just in case I said something that people didn't like or I made a poor judgment call on a joke and someone saw it as rude. I had no tokens available so this also gave me the chance to stand out in the chat window because Mod text appears in red.

What M didn't realize was that giving me this status would show the room she had done so. Queue the third degree from all the regular users.

Who is this guy?
Why is he so special all of a sudden?
Do we know him?

etc, etc, etc.

I didn't want to be identified straight away, I wanted to build a kind of acceptance first, so M brushed the questions off by saying that I was a user from another site who wanted to try things out here. They all seemed to accept that and moved on.

I felt stupid for a while, just watching the chat flow. Every now and again I would add my 10 cents but it would always seem to filter onto a topic that I had no idea on.

Then this new guy joins the chat and says ''hey bitch, get off the cam!!''

Instantly I feel a weird mixture of rage and excitement. Rage because he has insulted my girlfriend in such a public way and excitement because I finally get to impose my mod status and look good to M's viewers.

Click goes the mouse, highlight user, and..... Silence. Done

I giggle to myself with pride but the response wasn't as I expected.

M is on screen with her hand over her mouth. The chat window explodes with activity:

''Wow, that just happened!''
''OMG, What the hell!''
''uh-oh, new guy messed up''

I quickly feel the buzz of adrenaline sending my hands into a shiver. I even say out loud ''What?!''. I finally breathe after what seems to be an eternity of holding my breathe.

M then proceeds to tell the screen and room that she's sorry, ''he's new, he didn't know. I'm sorry. sorry. sorry''.

Turns out that not only was he a regular user, he was the guy who held the unofficial title of M's most generous tip. Great?! How was I to know. I'm instantly embarrassed and type sorry in the chat. I close the laptop and swear at myself.

A few minutes pass and M calls me to explain that it really wasn't a big deal, the guy found it funny and the room were laughing at how quickly I had exited.

To stop repeat performances of this, they have actually implemented a kind of code word. If trouble comes in and starts to cause a scene, the room will start dropping the code word into random sentences to let the model know he needs kicking. Next chance she gets....He's kicked.

This has become a kind of inside joke in our personal lives too. We could be at a family dinner or event. If one of us drops the word 'Ninja' into conversation then we know that something has been said that shouldn't of and its time to turn the topic to something else. If only people knew a) that we do that or b) that the reason it happens is that we started doing it on a porn site with success.

It took me a week to get the courage to go back into her room. When I did, it was brought up, but seemed to pass quicker than I expected. I have since found out that she had warned the guys how bad I felt, so it shouldn't be mentioned again.

As difficult as that first session was, it seemed to make me a member of the crew and I soon settled.

I started to learn each persons characteristic and what they brought to the room. Id say there were 5 'Friend' users that were always around. One girl was actually a Cam Model herself (who for the purpose of this story i'll call Liz) and was chatty but also flash with her tipping. I took an instant dislike to her and it took me forever to put my finger on why. Some may assume jealousy but it seemed so much more. I felt like she was always judging me about the way I would chat in the room. She had to end every debate or one up me on a story. Even when the gang would move into her room she would always find a reason to ignore me or what I had to say. To the point that I actually stopped going in her room.

I spoke to M after Liz finished a session online and just came out with it ''I don't like Liz you know, she's a dick''. Her jaw dropped to the ground in shock. To this day I don't think I have ever seen her look the same way as she did at that point. It was a combination of shock, confusion and a hint of despair. We sat down and she told me how Liz had been there from the start and was the one that encouraged her to try being a Cam Model. She was a true friend so I simply had to give her another chance. M went on to explain that do they frequently Skype text off cam..... she was the one person that knew who I was.

It suddenly made sense. The feeling I couldn't explain...gone.

She was testing me out. She had been getting to know me and was pushing my buttons to see how I would react so that I could be the one being analyzed !?!?!

Finding that out instantly changed our understanding and relationship with each other. In a way neither of us has ever acknowledged, we're cool. She was looking out for M, which impressed me, in turn Liz appreciated that I make M happy. Eventually she was a bridesmaid for M too!

Looking back to my feelings about Liz and the ill timed silencing of 'Mr Big' is funny these days and has turned into a topic of discussion on the more chilled out nights when M is on cam just reminiscing.

The night M finally shared with the group who I was has also turned into a kind of feature event in her time broadcasting.

Most Cam Models will know the pain that I regularly see on M's face during a show when she has to leave the screen for a moment to visit the restroom. Both chat and tips are flowing, its a busy night but you know the second you leave the room... people will disappear.

It was one such night and I could see the pain in M's face while she weighed up the results between holding it in or going for it. It couldn't wait and she accepted defeat. She warned the guys she was going to the bathroom and clicked to mute the room for a second.

Well.....that's what she thought. Only she hadn't clicked mute, she missed. Next thing you can hear is the unzipping of her corset off cam, the and the sound of a seat being put down (that's right, I am in the small group of guys that will lift a seat to pee, but refuse to place it back down), then a slow but very clear hissing as she begins to pee.

Now I know everyone does it, but I also know that she was very conscious about being heard. She was even more conscious that it should ever happen when a chat room of some 1500 people could hear.

I was equally embarrassed for her knowing how she felt and also worrying what it would do for her confidence. I shouted from the next room ''Baby, you left your mic on, I can hear you Peeing!!!''. She didn't say a word but she frantically scurried back to cam to silence it.

Too late. The room heard and were being playful with it. Until someone clicks on what they heard being shouted. ''Hang on, how did your boyfriend know we could hear?'' Busted. She grinned because it had distracted from the situation, then she came clean. She went into details on who I was in the chat room and that I had been trying to get everyone to like me. Most of the guys said they thought as much but never wanted to press and find out for risk of upsetting M, a few were genuinely surprised too.

It turned to a topic of discussion. People could see why we had done this. Luckily enough I had managed the transition from Spectator to friend in the room so we never had to find out what would happen if they didn't like me.

It was such a relief to come clean. While we hadn't done anything wrong....it was the final hurdle we had both been concerned by. Or so we thought.......

Next Post - Will you try camming with me?